Frequently Asked Questions
Do you recommend solitary, cry it out methods, such as spaced-soothing or timed responses?
No. I'm not comfortable with these strategies and I do not believe they are necessary. I specialise in attachment rather than detachment when helping families achieve their sleep goals. My preference is for continued and responsive parental presence throughout any adaptation of existing sleep rituals; even when independent sleep is the preferred goal. A big step like this, cannot be rushed. It requires patience, sensitivity and reassurance for little ones; steadily building confidence in new and happy routines, as we would when teaching them any new skills. Why should independent sleep be any different?
See my YouTube clip on Spaced-Soothing and why I have chosen not to teach this method of settling.
Are you just going to tell me to Sshhh & pat my baby?
No. I would imagine you tried that, long before calling me. Besides, many older babies and toddlers simply hate to be patted and this can be even more labour intensive than feeding or holding to sleep. Though it can be useful in some circumstances, I prefer to let babies explore their own happy ways of falling asleep. Your sleepy presence, close contact, and a pinch of curiosity may be all that's required of you.
Will making changes to sleep damage the attachment I have with my baby?
My preference is to make gradual alterations in sleep routines, step by step, with the continued and responsive presence of a parent or loved one until their help is no longer required. I support parents in developing the skills of mindful listening, co-regulation, emotion coaching, and calm quiet leadership. Excellent for supporting the nervous system of little ones during times of frustration or uncertainty, and for deepening attachment within the relationship. Placing loving limits is usually an unavoidable aspect of parenting. Far from causing fractures in attachment, when parents feel supported to make change in manageable steps, with patience and compassion, we often find the bond with their child deepens further.
Do you offer in-home support or is it all online?
In-home support is certainly a service I offer. This is often a great option for those families who consider themselves to be in a sleep crisis. Getting to know parents and children in-person, usually allows me to understand the situation in more detail and get to the root of the problem in the quickest possible time.
What are your beliefs on co-sleeping and attachment parenting?
I am a keen advocate of both. Bed sharing, baby wearing, extended breast feeding, tandem breastfeeding and elimination communication are things I have practiced with all 4 of my children. However, 18yrs ago many thought my ideas were a bit woo woo!! Thankfully these parenting philosophies are starting to be embraced by a broader population.
Do you provide follow-up support?
Yes! Soooo much. This is where the value really lies. 8 weeks of on going phone support is included in all of my support packages (not included with the 1hr basic consult). Most clients will book in at lea
st 1 call a week during that time. Others will book more and some will need less. Text messages and emails are also welcome within business hours and the private, Katie's Babies Facebook group is a reliable resource too.
Do you charge extra for siblings?
No. Practising holistically means that I always consider the sleep of other family members and siblings when problem solving with my clients. With an 8 week programme, we have plenty of time to address the sleep needs of more than one child.
See this video where I explain more: https://youtu.be/hdu6ICpdOc0
Can I still breast feed my baby before sleep?
Absolutely. What better way to relax and reconnect after a busy day. A boost in your Oxytocin levels (the hormone of love and connection), will be good for you both in your readiness for sleep.
Do you help with young babies?
Yes. From newborn. In these early months most of my work involves normalising the 'chaos' of infant sleep, demystifying the stages of development and allowing parents to avoid the endless Google searches when learning how to navigate these early months. I am also watchful for signs of health or feeding concerns that may complicate a baby's ability to sleep soundly. This is the time for nurturing attachment, building trust and fostering a simple love of sleep.
Do you work with toddlers?
Yes, yes, yes!! I love working with toddlers! They are really receptive to change, especially when bedtime is lots of fun, and they feel understood. It's a privilege to watch them transition from their ceaseless bedtime resistance, to actively leading the way to bed, with smiles and enthusiasm.
Will I have to follow a strict routine?
No. I may offer you recommendations for the timings of naps or bedtimes to optimise your child's readiness for sleep, but these are flexible and may well change anyway, depending on how your child responds. It is biologically normal for your baby to have slight variations in sleep needs from day to day. In most cases the best routines are the ones that emerge over time, once mum and baby's needs are addressed. I believe that schedules written by a stranger, for a 'typical' baby, simply set people up to feel like they're failing.
Will I have to keep a sleep diary?
No. Beyond my initial intake questionnaire, you won't be required to log anything unless of course you enjoy keeping records that way. It's usual for me ask about timing of naps or bedtimes during my support calls but approximations are fine. Some people become highly stressed by the numbers, therefore I don't usually place too much focus on data unless my clients feel that it's important to them.
How do I know which package is right for us?
Recently acquired sleep challenges that have arisen over the past month, can generally be resolved with just a 1hr phone consultation.
For long term sleep challenges, my Standard 8 Week Package is always my recommendation. Payment plans available.
If you are unsure, feel free to contact me outlining your situation and your aims and I can let you know the level of service that is most likely to help you achieve your goals. Alternatively, book in a free 15min discovery call here.
I'm on a budget. Will the Basic 1hr consult be enough to help us?
Sure. Consider it an 'initial consultation', during which I will be able to deliver clarity on your situation and help you discover the reasons why your child's sleep feels problematic. I will also be able to provide you with the initial steps required to understand your child's own unique sleep needs (and lets not forget their awake needs, too). This will help you release any worries concerning overtiredness while optimising your little one's readiness for sleep. For most of my clients, this information can help to initiate significant improvements to bedtime resistance, unsettled nights, early waking or tricky naps. An excellent leg-up for those families who then want to work on challenges concerning where or how their child falls asleep.
How does an overnight consultation work?
I made a video to answer this one. ;) https://youtu.be/tsJABOJJhC4
Do I have to stay at home for weeks now, to get the routine right?
Only if you enjoy staying at home! A social life is so important for your mental health. We'll figure out how to work naps into your ideal routine. Whether these need to happen in the stroller, the car, a sling or even on the beach...I'm easy!
Is it important that everyone follows the same routine?
Not really. Babies are quick to develop their expectations of different people. For example, breast feeding babies don't expect milk off anyone else than Mum. If Grandma loves to rock your baby to sleep now and then, that's totally fine. Especially if they both love it. We all know Grandma's job is to spoil us rotten!
Do you insist on a set bedtime?
No.... life will always throw up random events! Unexpected guests or the occasional, surprise bedtime poo!! I usually suggest aiming for an approximate bedtime but its ok to just roll with it, if you want to. Some people LOVE routines, but others hate them. I get that. I'm here to make your life easier, not to boss you around!
Do you insist on a set length of time for each nap?
No. If your baby's getting an average amount of sleep across 24 hrs and they're happy and feeding well, then however long the naps are, they're doing just fine. Don't waste precious hours resettling when you could be living life instead! There is zero scientific evidence to suggest how long infant naps 'should' be, despite what the generic sleep programmes may imply.
Can we still go to my family dinner, once a week?
Yes you must! Parents need to be parented too. It won't be a problem. I can help you work it in around your baby's evening.
What are your qualifications?
I have over 22yrs of clinical experience as a registered midwife. I have also achieved two qualifications in sleep consulting. The first with the Institute of sensitive sleep, and more recently I became the first Melbourne based, OCN level 6 accredited, Holistic Sleep Coach, through Lyndsey Hookway's training. At present, this is the highest internationally recognised infant sleep coaching qualification in the world, though I must add that sleep consulting is an entirely UNREGULATED profession. This means that training/certification is NOT a legal requirement, so ask plenty of questions when selecting your sleep consultant.
What is your success rate?
When hiring me, clients can expect to receive my expertise, reassurance, advice and a listening ear. I do not 'fix' children and neither do I make sleep guarantees. Each individual family's perceived success depends on many influencing factors, and most significantly, how well supported parents are feeling at home and within their social networks. Full disclosure, there is a small but real possibility that my clients will see no changes at all to their child's sleep situation. Particularly with babies less than 6 months of age. However, I'm extremely confident that with my support they will successfully optimise their own sleep and learn to feel calm & confident in parentings skills and judgement.
What if your suggestions make no difference to our sleep situation?
Great Question! I'm so glad you asked.
When parents tell me that something in our plan is not working, I ask lots more questions to find out what details I may have missed or what aspects of our plan might not feel right for them.
I NEVER tell them to simply start again or try harder. Instead, I provide support in breaking down the problems and steadily creating step by step solutions until goals start feeling more achievable. At the same time I also help parents to consider whether other obstacles in life, might be complicating their efforts to make change. This may not always be what they want to hear but open honesty is essential, particularly when progress seems blocked.
Full disclosure: I am also very frank in the early stages of working with clients. If any goals seem unrealistic in relation to a child's age, size, stage of development or any number of other factors, then it is my responsibility to be honest about this. Together with my clients, we ensure that our goals remain realistic and achievable for their individual child, their particular stage of development & the timing of their plan.
On occasions, when sleep progress seems to be static, this can also be an indication that we need to explore the potential for underlying health conditions. In this situation I might then suggest involvement of other health professionals to help investigate for things like feeding complications, nutritional deficiencies or airway concerns as potential obstacles to improving sleep.
Where can I read your terms & conditions?
Do you offer payment plans or a budget friendly option?
Payment plans are available for any of my 8-week packages if you were keen for the ongoing support. For my Standard Distance Package, I offer 3 fortnightly instalments. Please enquire if you would like to arrange a payment plan for another package option.
Initial 1hr assessment & consultation This option will help to get you started. This includes a comprehensive intake questionnaire ahead of time, so that you can share as much information with me as possible, prior to our appointment. That way we can move straight into clarifying your challenges and mapping out a plan for initiating change. A great option for people who are hesitant about purchasing long term sleep support but are keen to start somewhere
Follow-up calls: Following the initial 1hr appointment above, should you have extra questions or would like pay-as-you-go follow-up support, then I offer individual 30min Maintenance calls. This way you only purchase the appointments you need. Alternatively, you can upgrade to an 8 week package if you decide that day to day support and SMS would be helpful.